ZONE-Tan vs Michael Bay
Tan vs Bay
Battle information
Release date November 1, 2015
Number 13
Previous Kate Upton vs Marilyn Monroe
Next Sam & Dean vs Bo & Kenzi
Other information
Rappers Zone tan by imblue300-d54katg121019b michael bay
Cameos Dan
Location(s) Z-TV News Studio

ZONE-Tan vs Michael Bay is the thirteenth installment of Alanomaly Rap Battles. It features mascot of ZONE-Suma, ZONE-Tan, battling action movie director, Michael Bay.




Hello, and welcome to our show. We have a not-so-special guest today,

Ruining Transformers and the Ninja Turtles, it's Michael Bay!

Like everything in your movies, your ego's extremely blown up,

You shouldn't even try to beat me, keep your dick holster shut.

Step up to ZONE-Tan and you're sure to feel the Pain,

But unlike the cash from your movies, there's nothing for you to Gain!

Take it from Nimoy, you need to Live Long and Prosper,

The chances of you winning? This battle outta be an Oscar!

Check back with Lucas, maybe you can ruin The Force when it Awakens

But for now, I'm beating you with second degree burns of Kevin Bacon!

Michael BayEdit

That's enough from you, it's onto my favorite part of the show,

Raps reflective of my movies: Action packed with a Tan of explosive ZONEs!

Get ready for a Massacre, cause this is a Rap-ityville on Elm Street of Horror,

Like a Japanese Bumblebee, I'll sting ZONE-Tan like The Island with Pearl Harbor!

We've come to a crossroads, this is where I blow up the scene!

It's the Armageddon of ZONE-Archives, a place even I'd consider obscene!

You'd like to teach the world to fap? Bitch, Megan Fox does that all day!

When I wanna blow up a franchise, she comes running to me like I was her Michael Bae!

This battle is gonna be the death of your porn, so you may as well just Smith your Will!

You've taken so much from Lenny, that I've got just one question for you: Got Milk?


I hereby announce these awards to Mr. Michael Bay:

Worst rapping, picture, director, and screeenplay!


Um, ZONE-Tan, I think you need to see this

(Dave gives ZONE-Tan a piece of paper.)


Huh? Pokemon 2017 by Michael Bay? WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?!

(ZONE-Tan turns into her demonic form.)



(ZONE-Tan calms down and returns to her normal self.)

I rock the Google Search Interests, while you rock a movie with Dwayne Johnson's nickname,

I end you like a toy train, a disaster like your directing, surrounded in flames.

You've lost this battle, I'll see you later, old chap,

And, as always, I'm watching you fap!

Michael BayEdit

I bring the Miami Heat when I blow up a whore on the mic!

Nicolas Cage you and send you to Alcatraz, you'll for once not wanna drop the soap tonight!

I'm a Bonecrusher who destroys people in my way with such Grace,

Crush anime and make better use of ZONE-Archive's porno flash face!

Call my rhymes NSFW cause Newgrounds will fire you after I win this,

Got a first work of film more notable than your flash game with Kylie Griffin is!

I'll buy material from your website, and take over Z-TV News,

And have Shia LeBeouf yell "JUST DO IT!" when people wanna try to find your leaked nudes.

I break a Caxx in half when I spit Dark like the Side of the Moon

It's no surprise you turned demonic, cause I bring out the worst in cartoons!


Who Won?

The poll was created at 15:41 on November 1, 2015, and so far 6 people voted.


  • This is the first battle to include someone associated with pornography.
Alanomaly Rap Battles
Season One
Big Time Rush vs Flight of the Conchords | Will Smith vs Adam Sandler | Queen Elsa vs Sub-Zero | Ben 10 vs The Doctor | Eminem vs Johnny Cash | Garfield vs Snoopy | Leif Erikson vs Dovahkiin | H. H. Holmes vs Norman Bates | Johnny 5 vs Claptrap | Gods Hindu vs Egyptian
Season 2
Assassins Historical vs Creed | Kate Upton vs Marilyn Monroe | ZONE-Tan vs Michael Bay | Sam & Dean vs Bo & Kenzi | Alexander the Great vs Ivan the Terrible | Dorothy vs Alice | Kanto Starters vs Kalos Starters | Marry Poppins vs Miss Frizzle | Willy Wonka vs Adam Richman | Animorphs vs Transformers
Season 3
Top Gear vs TAPS | Nietzsche vs Marx | Hex Girls vs The Dazzlings | Lewis & Clark vs Patterson & Gimlin | Scott Pilgrim vs Super Sonico | Edward Elric vs Generator Rex | Walter White vs Light Yagami | Goku vs Godzilla | Hannibal Lecter vs Ken Kaneki | Tim Burton vs Jim Henson
Season 4
Team Crafted vs Yogscast | Captain Jack Sparrow vs Tony Montanya | Butcher Babies vs Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi | KISS vs The Wiggles | RWBY vs Power Rangers | The Circle vs The Circle | Chipmunks vs Animaniacs | GLaDOS vs AUTO | Viennese School vs N.W.A. | Don Giovanni vs Lust
T-Dub vs Rappin For Jesus | Grinch vs Cthulhu
Bonus Battles
Deadpool vs Harley Quinn | ATLAS & P-Body vs sans & PAPYRUS: Pacifist Edition | ATLAS & P-Body vs sans & PAPYRUS: Genocide Edition